BLAINESWORLD #1135 (Please send any comments to: bginbc@aol.com.)

Section 2, part 2

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Section 12A, NC events

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Section 12B. NJ/PA events

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BLAINESWORLD #1134 (Please send any comments to: bginbc@aol.com.)

Section 7 

Using The Bible To Contradict Jesus

by Guy Sayles*

No, Attorney General Sessions, you may not use Paul’s words in Romans 13:1 to justify the heinous separation of children from their parents. That text was abused by church officials who ordered the brutal Crusades against Muslims, by southern preachers who sought to prop-up the Confederacy’s shameful claim that slavery was consistent with God’s will, and by German Christians who cravenly legitimated Nazism.
Like them, Sessions has made the Bible a tool of propaganda. He has attempted to clothe naked cruelty with scripture, and he has failed.
Romans 13, like all biblical texts, requires interpretation, not just citation or quotation. Paul assumed that the government to which a Christian would be subject would not be a “terror to good conduct but to bad” (Romans 13:3) and that it would “serve the good” (13:4). Paul goes on to say that Christians should “owe no one anything, except to love one another” (13:8) and that “love does no wrong to a neighbor” (13:10). How can we ever, except by the blunting of conscience, call ripping a child from its mother’s arms “good conduct” or “love of neighbor”?
Paul wrote the Letter to the Romans around 60 C.E. Whatever the nature of the Empire’s treatment of Christians in Rome might have been at that time, we know it had changed and become far more hostile, by the end of the first century, when the Elder John penned Book of Revelation. When John wrote about the Empire, he referred to it as a “beast” who “uttered haughty and blasphemous words” and demanded acquiescent obedience, even nationalistic worship. John urged Christians not to submit to the beast, even if it cost them their lives (see Revelation 13:5-10).
Clearly, the New Testament has more the one view of government and Christians’ relationship to it.
Most importantly, for followers of Jesus, if someone uses Scripture to contradict Jesus-to lead us away from his words, deeds, and character-we can be sure they have misused it.  In his well-known parable about judgment (Matthew 25:31f.), a king rewards his “righteous” citizens for their deeds of justice and compassion. They ask:  “Lord, when was it that we saw you hungry and gave you food or thirst and gave you something to drink? And when was it we saw you a stranger and welcomed you, or naked and gave you clothing? And when was it that we saw you sick or in prison and visited you?”
The king replies: “Truly I tell you, just as you did it to one of the least of these, you did it to me.”
Can you imagine that Jesus, for whom active love for the least and last was a test of righteousness, treating people the way our government is now treating the strangers who appear at our borders?  I cannot.
Sometimes governments commit injustices, limit freedoms and deny basic human rights. In such circumstances, Christians cannot quietly go along. We are citizens first of the rule and reign of God.  Our first loyalty is to the will and way of Jesus.
We need to acknowledge that the United States, like each of its citizens, is flawed. Like all things human, our nation “sins and falls short of the glory of God.” It isn’t immune to the infections of injustice and greed or outbreaks of harshness and cruelty. For that reason, I resonate with this stanza in “America the Beautiful”; it’s a prayer for national reformation:
America!  America!
God mend thine every flaw
Confirm thy soul in self-control,
Thy liberty in law.
What if we sang that song at the border, along with this one?
Jesus loves the little children
All the children of the world.
Red and yellow black and white
They are precious in his sight.
Jesus loves the little children of the world.
*Reprinted with Guy’s gracious permission from his Facebook post of June 16, 2018.

 

 

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BLAINESWORLD #1133 (Please send any comments to: bginbc@aol.com.)

Section 2, part 2

(1) Natalie Kaye: We walked out of Oceans 8.  Have you seen it.?  We haven’t done that in a long time.  It was terrible.

Response: Great minds thinking alike. We did the same. … And was surprised, in that the first five minutes were terrific.

(2) Gary Booth: Nice to have seen you and your lovely bride at the play today! I was remiss in not introducing my wife Patti, especially since I speak of you each Sunday when reading BLAINESWORLD, but she says hello and we both say “keep up the good work.”

Note: The play Gary was referring to was DON’T DRESS FOR DINNER. (See also Section 1 for more information.)

(3) Peter Rigas: How do I unsubscribe to this stupid thing:) Just kidding bg. You’re the best.

(4) Thanks to all those who responded to let me know that they could (or could not) see Facebook videos. It appears you don’t have be a Facebook member to review them, but yo do have to click the option that says you are not a Facebook member. Doing so should then enable you to then see the video and/or other material.

(5)

 

 

(6)

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Section 12A, NC events

(1) Issues With Mike Grell, hosted by Jeff Messer
Sunday, June 24 at 7:30 P.M.
Magnetic Theatre, 350 Depot St, Asheville, NC

Iconic Comic Book creator Mike Grell sits down with host Jeff Messer for an “Inside The Actor’s Studio” style interview. The interview is being filmed for a future release, and will feature Grell discussing his life and career, as well as doing live art demonstrations, answering fan questions, and more!

Lucky audience members will leave the show with some unique originals and prints by Grell!

The show is called “Issues With…” and Mike Grell is the first guest for the pilot episode of what could become an ongoing series of interviews with comic book greats.

Be in the live audience of this first episode of “Issues With…”

$10 general admission
http://www.themagnetictheatre.org/

Free tickets will be given to fans who purchase original sketches or art from Grell as his June 23 appearance at Comic Envy

Image may contain: 3 people, people smiling

(2) Love Makes a Home: Life of Rebecca Boone, wife of Daniel Boone
Saturday, June 30 at 3 p.m.
Folk Art Center, Milepost 382 Blue Ridge Parkway, Asheville, North Carolina

Tickets:
rebeccaboone.brownpapertickets.com

Daniel Boone’s first trek through the Cumberland Gap is nearing its 250th anniversary! This play tells the Boone family story through the eyes of his wife, Rebecca, played by Patti Louise Smith It’s exciting! William Ritter will fiddle 12 old time tunes.

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Section 12B, PA/NJ event

(1) Shakespeare ’70 to Present ‘Merry Wives of Windsor’ at MCCC’s Kelsey Theatre June 22 to July 1

West Windsor, N.J. – Shakespeare’s light-hearted comedy about societal hierarchies and the power of love to bring them down comes to the stage at Mercer County Community College’s (MCCC’s) Kelsey Theatre. In their annual tribute to The Bard, Shakespeare ’70 presents “The Merry Wives of Windsor” Fridays, June 22 and 29 at 8 p.m.; Saturdays, June 23 and June 30 at 8 p.m.; and Sundays, June 24 and July 1 at 2 p.m.

Kelsey Theatre is located on the college’s West Windsor Campus, 1200 Old Trenton Road. A reception with the cast and crew follows the opening night performance on June 22.

First performed in 1602, “The Merry Wives of Windsor” has been hailed for dramatizing the emergence of a new middle class, eschewing pretension and aristocratic authority, while championing female autonomy and the power of love to break down class distinctions. It reintroduces the character of Falstaff, the larger-than-life aging knight known from several of Shakespeare’s previous History plays. It is said that Queen Elizabeth the First directly requested this play, telling Shakespeare she would like to see Falstaff in a romantic comedy.

Comic intrigues indeed abound, as upper- and lower-class characters are drawn together in the close-knit Windsor community. The main plot surrounds the virtuous but feisty Mistress Page and Mistress Ford, who are married to two wealthy men of Windsor. They are about to prove that wives can be merry and faithful at the same time – which Mr. Page understands, but Mr. Ford doubts. With themes that are strikingly relevant today, the women set out to trick the sexually predatory Falstaff and cure Mr. Ford of his jealousy. Meanwhile, the Pages’ daughter, Anne, is married to Fenton, a man of higher rank, but less wealth. Their love is a testimony to social assimilation that allows individuals to transcend class and create new and inclusive social groups.

The cast stars Dale Simon of Flemington as Sir John Falstaff; Brittany Rivera of  Hamilton as Mistress Alice Ford; Kyla Mostello Donnelly of Levittown, Pa., as Mistress Margaret Page; Michael Krahel of Hillsborough as Master Ford; Timothy Kirk of Delran as Master Page; Charlotte Kirkby of Ewing as Anne Page; Evan Chartock of West Windsor as William Page; Patrick Lavery of Flemington as Sir Hugh Evans; Olivier Leroux of Pennington as Doctor Caius; Susan Blair of Philadelphia, Pa., as Mistress Quickly; Mort Paterson of Philadelphia, Pa., as Robert Shallow; Christopher Loos of Newton as Abraham Slender; Christopher Soto of Hightstown as Rugby, servant to Caius; Ernie Albanesius of Chesterfield as Pistol, follower of Falstaff; Peyton Estabrook of Hightstown as Bardolph, follower of Falstaff; Daniel Altobelli of Mount Holly as Nym, follower of Falstaff; Fiona Misiura of Hightstown as Robin, servant to Falstaff; Isabelle Bannon of Princeton as Simple, servant to Slender; John Fischer of Hamilton as Fenton; and Russ Walsh of Morrisville, Pa., as the Host of the Garter Inn.

The production team includes Director John F. Erath, Assistant Director Janet Quartarone, Producer Curt Foxworth, Stage Manager Lili Timmes, Technical Director Dale Simon, Sound Designer Andrew Timmes, Assistant Stage Manager Samantha Miller, and Assistant Stage Manager Brenna Herrity.

Shakespeare ’70’s repertoire covers 40 years of productions ranging from the comedies, tragedies and histories of our Great Namesake, to the works of some outstanding modern playwrights. The theater company spans three generations of actors, directors and technical crew, united by a love for classic theater. More about Shakespeare ’70 is available at www.shakespeare70.org or on Facebook.

Tickets are $18 for adults; $16 for seniors; and $14 for students/children. Tickets may be purchased online at www.kelseytheatre.net or by calling the Kelsey Box Office at 609-570-3333. Kelsey Theatre is wheelchair accessible, with free parking next to the theater. For a complete listing of adult and children’s events, visit the Kelsey website or call the box office for a brochure.

(2) PLUMSTEAD HISTORICAL SOCIETY

The Plumstead Historical Society will hold its monthly meeting, Monday, June 18th, 2018 at 7 PM

Program ~  Show and Tell bring and Old/Historical item and or Share a story about Plumstead.

Meeting Place Plumstead Township Office 5186 Stump Road Plumsteadville PA.

Next Meeting: July 15, 2018 at 4:30pm – Annual Pot-Luck picnic at Ralph Stover State Park 

 

 

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BLAINESWORLD #1132 (Please send any comments to: bginbc@aol.com.)

Section 2, part 2

(1) Kathy Edwards: Love Seeing These Photos!! :)))

(2)

(3)

(4)

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Section 12A, NC events

(1) The SuperHappy Radio Hour: True Crime!
returns on Sunday at 7:30 PM

at The Magnetic Theatre
375 Depot St, Asheville, North Carolina

for tickets:
www.themagnetictheatre.org

(2) David Troy Fancis:

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Section 12B, PA/NJ event

The Triplets!
Friday, June 22 at 7 PM – 10 PM

The Temperance House
5 S State St, Newtown, Bucks County, Pennsylvania

Bring your requests! This local acoustic group covers everything Classic Rock, before and since! They are always a GREAT time and we’re excited to see you here!

Image may contain: 3 people, people on stage, people playing musical instruments and indoor

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BLAINESWORLD #1131 (Please send any comments to: bginbc@aol.com.)

Section 2, part 2

(1) Seve Rizzo [in response to my question about his favorite movies]: Thank you. Not necessarily Mr. Curious. Just lured by your invitation to ask. I don’t see a lot of movies, and usually forget them immediately. Or very quickly. And no one I know has my taste. But here are the ones that stick out now. I might come up with a few more and you might say “stop, those are nobody’s taste.” I’ll bet you a fiver (cents) that they’re not your cup of tea.

Perfume, The Story of a Murderer.
mother! (Small “m.”)
Green Room
Don’t Breath (I think. Google scary movie with blind Vietnam vet.)
Splice
10 Cloverfield.
Melancholia
The Details (Toby Maguire)
When the Bough Breaks
Breaking In
Get Out
Martha Marcy May Marlene
London is Falling     Just ok
Eye in the Sky       Just ok
The Call   Just ok
mother!   (I really had fun with that one.)
Run Lola Run
Hardcore Henry (not dirty) reminded me of Run Lola Run
Elvis & Nixon
Paranormal Activity (I recommend that to no one, not even me. Never.)
(2) Mike Yow: I love that old pic from 1976, sir! 😉

(3)  Laura Beyer: I know you like movies as much as I do. I am watching a bunch of them this weekend having borrowed 7 from the library. I just saw “Breathe” and liked it very much. It is a true story about a “golden couple” very much in love. He catches polio and she is pregnant. They are told that he will be confined to a respirator for the rest of his life. But some how they hook up with a man who helps him by building a device that makes the respirator usable at home so they can bring him home. Then they modify it for portable use. It is so good.

You recommended “Deli Man” a year or so ago. I finally got it out. I was amazed to find “Hobby’s Restaurant” in Newark featured on it. I had been there once with my Aunt Eadie who worked in the area.

(4) Zuzu Welsh: Surf in and vote Zuzu Welsh Band – The Tavern

https://www.sitelistener.com/poll1963698x6e03448F-53

(5) Ilene Logelin: Didn’t know about your hernia operation. Glad that you are doing well. Thanks for jokes 1 &3. A giggle a day keeps the blues away!

(6)

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Section 12A. NC events

(1) David Joe Miller: The Friends of the Buncombe County Library present Storyteller and Producer, David Joe Miller on Thursday evening June 21st at 7pm in the Lord Auditorium of Pack Memorial Library, 67 Haywood St. in downtown Asheville.  Doors will open at 6:30 and show will end by 7:50pm.

David Joe will be telling family stories and speaking on the importance of those family stories.  After the show he will discuss ways of finding, learning and telling your own family stories.  “So many people I encounter feel that they really don’t have many interesting family stories but, with a little urging and a few memory starters, I can usually help them discover a treasure of family characters, settings and plots that they can develop into amazing stories.” says Miller.

In 1989, David Joe Miller began his storytelling career as an employee of the National Storytelling Association and Festival in Jonesborough, TN.  He soon became their staff storyteller and created the Jonesborough Storytellers Guild which is now the oldest performing storytellers guild in the country.

In 1997, David Joe launched his free-lance storytelling career and has traveled all over the United States telling stories in schools, libraries, corporate boardrooms and festivals.  He has taught corporate executives and sales leaders how to use narrative in their presentations and has taught teachers how to use persuasive storytelling in teaching narrative writing skills.  He has entertained thousands including audiences at Disney, World Bank, Library of Congress, The Smithsonian, The Nature Conservancy and a fundraising event for former Vice President, Al Gore.

Today David Joe and his wife Robin, reside in Asheville where he continues to tell stories.  David Joe also produces spoken word shows for storytellers and poets at several different venues in Asheville as well as venues in Jonesborough, TN, The Storytelling Capital of the World.

More information can be found at http://www.davidjoemiller.com/ and http://www.storytellingcalendar.com/

(2) Kimberly Hughes:

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Section 12B, PA/NJ event

Laugh-Out-Loud Tribute to Wild ’70s in Disaster! A Musical,’ Coming to MCCC’s Kelsey Theatre June 8 to 17

West Windsor, N.J. – From earthquakes to tidal waves to infernos, disaster movies were the film genre of the 1970s that just would not go away. Prepare to laugh as Pierrot Productions presents “Disaster! A Musical” at Mercer County Community College’s (MCCC’s) Kelsey Theatre. Dates and show times are Fridays, June 8 and 15 at 8 p.m.; Saturdays, June 9 and June 16 at 8 p.m.; and Sundays, June 10 and 17 at 2 p.m.

Kelsey Theatre is located on the college’s West Windsor Campus, 1200 Old Trenton Road. A reception with the cast and crew follows the opening night performance on June 8.

Audiences can relive – or discover for the first time – an era at the movies that brought disaster at every turn. When a group of New Yorkers attends the opening of a floating casino and disco, chaos ensues in the form of multiple calamities that harken back to such films as “Earthquake,” “The Swarm,” and “The Poseidon Adventure.” The parody is full-on ’70s, adorned by cringe worthy fashions like platform shoes and bell bottoms, and set to the beat of hit songs such as “Hooked on a Feeling,” “Sky High,” “I Am Woman” and “Hot Stuff.” Written by Seth Rudetsky and Jack Plotnick, the show had a 2016 run on Broadway that included a Tony Award nomination.

The ensemble cast features Chris Schmalbach of Palmyra as Ted, Haley Schmalbach of Palmyra as Sister Mary, Jennifer Fischer of Hamilton as Marianne, Jennifer Winn of Ewing as Jackie, Jim Petro of Hamilton as Chad, Joe Zedeny of East Windsor as Tony, Connor McDowell of Levittown, Pa., as Scott, Jeffrey Milstein of East Windsor as Maury, Joseph Stockette as Langhorne, Pa., as Jake, Nicholas Benedetti of Ewing as Ben/Lisa, Ally Masson of Levittown, Pa., as Levora, and Gina Migliaccio of Hamilton as Shirley. Playing multiple roles are Mike Wemer of Mt. Holly and Dana Cavagnaro of Hillsborough. (Among these roles are workmen, chef, waitress, taxi driver, wealthy couple, blinded woman, victims and passengers.)

The production team includes Artistic Director Pete LaBriola, Musical Director Lou Woodruff, Vocal Director Janine Bowen and Choreographer Kat Ross-Kline.

Tickets are $20 for adults; $18 for seniors; and $16 for students/children. Tickets may be purchased online at www.kelseytheatre.net or by calling the Kelsey Box Office at 609-570-3333. Kelsey Theatre is wheelchair accessible, with free parking next to the theater. For a complete listing of adult and children’s events, visit the Kelsey website or call the box office for a brochure.

 

 

 

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BLAINESWORLD #1130 (Please send any comments to: bginbc@aol.com.)

Section 2, part 2

(1) Kai Elijah Hamilton: 

Image may contain: text

(2) Amazon Banning Customers for Too Many Returns

https://nypost.com/2018/05/22/amazon-banning-customers-for-too-many-returns/

(3) How to Succeed Llike the Simpsons

https://www.wsj.com/articles/how-to-succeed-like-the-simpsons-1527253200?emailToken=769119494c7a89da728761139cbb5d08U9okxCaZIGUxMrrAQzRpo/Vwuh+fpwgU4Z7vuIg40o9rQlPOrIksHRdymYoEzDxFnQd4zm5yEl31SHnhqTUn5A%3D%3D&reflink=article_email_share

(4) Natalie Kaye:  Saw RBG.  Loved it.  Highly recommend it.

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Section 12A, NC events

(1)

Image may contain: 7 people, including Karen Covington-Yow, Hannah Marie Williams-Beaver, Carrie Kimbrell Kimzey and Darren Marshall, people smiling, text

Note: I recently saw a preview production of the above play. It was a lot of fun. More details to follow next week.

(2) JUNE 10: Yoga & Your Dosha with Jamie
12:30 PM – 2:30 PM
Asheville Community Yoga
8 Brookdale Rd, Asheville, North Carolina
For tickets, please click:
ashevillecommunityyoga.com

Image may contain: 1 person, smiling, standing, sitting, shoes and outdoor

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Section 12B, PA/NJ events

(1) Laugh-Out-Loud Tribute to Wild ’70s in Disaster! A Musical,’ Coming to MCCC’s Kelsey Theatre June 8 to 17

West Windsor, N.J. – From earthquakes to tidal waves to infernos, disaster movies were the film genre of the 1970s that just would not go away. Prepare to laugh as Pierrot Productions presents “Disaster! A Musical” at Mercer County Community College’s (MCCC’s) Kelsey Theatre. Dates and show times are Fridays, June 8 and 15 at 8 p.m.; Saturdays, June 9 and June 16 at 8 p.m.; and Sundays, June 10 and 17 at 2 p.m.

Kelsey Theatre is located on the college’s West Windsor Campus, 1200 Old Trenton Road. A reception with the cast and crew follows the opening night performance on June 8.

Audiences can relive – or discover for the first time – an era at the movies that brought disaster at every turn. When a group of New Yorkers attends the opening of a floating casino and disco, chaos ensues in the form of multiple calamities that harken back to such films as “Earthquake,” “The Swarm,” and “The Poseidon Adventure.” The parody is full-on ’70s, adorned by cringe worthy fashions like platform shoes and bell bottoms, and set to the beat of hit songs such as “Hooked on a Feeling,” “Sky High,” “I Am Woman” and “Hot Stuff.” Written by Seth Rudetsky and Jack Plotnick, the show had a 2016 run on Broadway that included a Tony Award nomination.

The ensemble cast features Chris Schmalbach of Palmyra as Ted, Haley Schmalbach of Palmyra as Sister Mary, Jennifer Fischer of Hamilton as Marianne, Jennifer Winn of Ewing as Jackie, Jim Petro of Hamilton as Chad, Joe Zedeny of East Windsor as Tony, Connor McDowell of Levittown, Pa., as Scott, Jeffrey Milstein of East Windsor as Maury, Joseph Stockette as Langhorne, Pa., as Jake, Nicholas Benedetti of Ewing as Ben/Lisa, Ally Masson of Levittown, Pa., as Levora, and Gina Migliaccio of Hamilton as Shirley. Playing multiple roles are Mike Wemer of Mt. Holly and Dana Cavagnaro of Hillsborough. (Among these roles are workmen, chef, waitress, taxi driver, wealthy couple, blinded woman, victims and passengers.)

The production team includes Artistic Director Pete LaBriola, Musical Director Lou Woodruff, Vocal Director Janine Bowen and Choreographer Kat Ross-Kline.

Tickets are $20 for adults; $18 for seniors; and $16 for students/children. Tickets may be purchased online at www.kelseytheatre.net or by calling the Kelsey Box Office at 609-570-3333. Kelsey Theatre is wheelchair accessible, with free parking next to the theater. For a complete listing of adult and children’s events, visit the Kelsey website or call the box office for a brochure.

(2) At Actors’ Net in Morrisville, PA:

THE SUM OF US  
by David Stevens.
Jun 1 – 17, 2018
David Stevens’ delightful comedy about a straight Australian father who goes way overboard in supporting his gay son’s lifestyle – to the point of driving his son crazy.

T

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BLAINESWORLD #1129 (Please send any comments to: bginbc@aol.com.)

Section 2, part 2

(1) Pat Hannigan: PF Changs can be hit or miss. The one in Atlantic City is usually pretty good. But there is one in Warrington PA that is not good. I’m finding that it can be hit or miss with these Chain restaurants. Like Carabbas. They usually are always great! However, they had one in Pleasantville NJ near the shore and it was hit or miss. They actually closed.. But the one in Bensalem on Street road is excellent and usually its packed!!! Same with Olive Garden. One can be good and others are so so.

(2) Where you live has a bigger impact on happiness and health than you might imagine

https://www.washingtonpost.com/national/health-science/where-you-live-has-a-bigger-impact-on-happiness-and-health-than-you-might-imagine/2018/05/11/16be7126-2c55-11e8-8ad6-fbc50284fce8_story.html?noredirect=on&utm_term=.5b6ec98342d2

(3) Six Actually Convincing Ways to Fake a Tan

https://www.wsj.com/articles/6-actually-convincing-ways-to-fake-a-tan-1526401423?emailToken=186e228bc66b1164ee259eb18c7a075c0dNfUEORces0owfPWiw0YX1T9jODoWm%2F3ppMgL6gPcWOVvucRHVuoxNlV%2Bodsw05wU%2FTD3ucd4AJ68uMP9GOEFxlghBHdCMNjGEedMHvc3w%3D

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Section 11, Thought for the day

A BETTER WAY TO FIGHT ANY WAR (long, but well worth the read):
Draft guys over 60!

I am over 60. and the Armed Forces thinks I’m too old to track down terrorists.

You can’t be older than 42 to join the military. They’ve got the whole thing ass-backwards. Instead of sending 18-year-olds off to fight, they ought to take us old guys.

You shouldn’t be able to join a military unit until you’re at least 35. For starters, researchers say 18-year-olds think about sex every 10 seconds. Old guys only think about sex a couple of times a day, leaving us more than 28,000 additional seconds per day to concentrate on the enemy.

Young guys haven’t lived long enough to be cranky, and a cranky soldier is a dangerous soldier. My back hurts! I can’t sleep, I’m tired and hungry.’ We are impatient and maybe letting us kill some asshole that desperately deserves it will make us feel better and shut us up for a while.

An 18-year-old doesn’t even like to get up before 10am. Old guys always get up early to pee, so what the hell. Besides, like I said, I’m tired and can’t sleep and since I’m already up, I may as well be up killing some fanatical son-of-a-bitch.

If captured we couldn’t spill the beans because we’d forget where we put them. In fact, name, rank, and serial number would be a real brainteaser. Boot camp would be easier for old guys. We’re used to getting screamed and yelled at and we’re used to soft food.

We’ve also developed an appreciation for guns. We’ve been using them for years as an excuse to get out of the house, away from the screaming and yelling. They could lighten up on the obstacle course, however… I’ve been in combat and never saw a single 20-foot wall with rope hanging over the side, nor did I ever do any pushups after completing basic training.

Actually, the running part is kind of a waste of energy, too. … I’ve never seen anyone outrun a bullet. An 18-year-old has the whole world ahead of him. He’s still learning to shave, as well as how to start a conversation with a pretty girl. He still hasn’t figured out that a baseball cap has a brim to shade his eyes, not the back of his head.

These are all great reasons to keep our kids at home to learn a little more about life before sending them off into harm’s way. Let us old guys track down those dirty rotten coward terrorists. The last thing an enemy would want to see is a couple million pissed off old farts with attitudes and automatic weapons, who know that their best years are already behind them.

HEY How about recruiting Women over 50 … in menopause! You think MEN have attitudes?? Ohhhhhhhhhhhh my God!! If nothing else, put them on border patrol. They’ll have it secured the first night!

Send this to all your senior friends. And make the font size larger, so they can read it.

 

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